Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Mind Your Language.

Why do we as Kenyans so hung up on peoples accent until our entire comedy industry is based on just merely mimicking accents from different communities around the country. I have always wondered if Kenyans have got a unique Kenyan accent like South Africans, Nigerians or Ugandans that is because we are so diverse. Even for a city born person like me I find myself occassionally slipping in a kimeru shrub once in a while. Whenever I go upcountry my cousins and aunties are always teasing me on my pathetic mothertounge which I keep on mixing up with Kikuyu. Many times we try and guess where people come from by how they speak but with all the intermarriages and a generation that can barely speak their mother tounges I forsee that ability to differentiate kenyans slowly disappearing.

I got this forward from my bro' which made me laugh!
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English.

  • "In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c" . Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
  • There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
  • In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where! more komplikated changes are possible.Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
  • By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
  • During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi blriten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.

e drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted inze forst plas.
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl

19 comments:

Aizoh said...

Haiya, I've never thought of that. Whether Kenyans have their own "peculiar" accent.No, I dont think so.We shrub differently. A luo "srub" is very different from a Kyuk "shlub".You dont surprise me.I think the hardest accent to drop in Kenya is the Meru accent.

Anonymous said...

I think we do have a unique way of speaking which i think i can identify even if you do not carry a local language influenced accent. We are unique.

mama shady said...

yeah, we definitely do have an accent its just subtle.you have a point there about our comedy industry...they need more material methinks. but i guess for them, that is whats selling at the moment.

jm said...

Aii Kirima: R u sure about a generation that can't speak mother-tongue ama taht's only in tao?

Unknown said...

@Aizoh, True about that Meru accent just look at Kiraitu who is a Havard educated lawyer and still has the accent.
@Methu, It would probably take an outsider to know the unique Kenyan accent
@Mamashady, I am also soo tired of the old language jokes over and over again
@Mwangi, Ni kweli some of us are totally mixed up personally I am accused of speaking Kimeru with a Kikuyu accent if that is possible.

Anonymous said...

The Kenyans who don't have mothertoungue-influence-direct-injection have English and/or Swahili accents. That's why it was easy for me to read the German up there.

Lakini Kiraitu's, I think he just likes to identify with his tribe. If he worked hard at it the accent wuda disappeared in Havand.

Unyc said...

@Aizo lol..

@Kirima I penda Luo n Kao accents. I laugh ile mbaya. As for telling who a Kenyan is, its almost impossible unless they speak in their mother-tongue which some dont even know or dont gv 2 hoots about learning it.

Komi said...

So we shall be speaking English but writing in German.
I agree with Mwangi that only those born in towns are likely to lose the mother tongue. But I have always wondered...Why do we make fun of our people when they shrub? What is wrong with having a local accent? Why should we struggle to speak with a foreign accent? Why is it cool not to know your mother tongue? Who brain washed us? Why did we agree to be brain washed?
We should maintain our accents so long as we can communicate and teach our kids our languages to perfection.That'd make us a rich nation.

Klara said...

This Interesting! When was that agreement! Me I will stick with my way of talkin n writtin!
Kenyans dont have one! Bt I guess people from same tribes do!

Unyc said...

about the shrubs, at home we had a book that we wld write any shrub by any1 in our family. My mum hs a prob with l n r n my sis's r always almost rolin on the floor in laugter. she hs never juad y they cheka so much...i wonder what she'd do...hehee
i find it funny when pple do shrub n really laugh..ata mimi nukishrub pple r free kunicheka.
its gd 2 mfind humuor in alot of situations...

Unknown said...

Kugwara ni lazima kaa we ni Mkenya kamili, na kuchekelewa ukigwara ndo culture ya Wakenya, ispokua kaa pia we unagwara...
Kwanza Mkambodia na Mlunje baana.. Mkale achaa na yeye, ikikuja msapere we tia tu zii... Ati "am rukin for fakin araod taon" - Am lookin for parkin around town...
Enyewe it gives us an identity, na siezi taka iyo iishe.. Na inakaa ni kaa inakalas..

Unknown said...

@Bomseh,Yes it shound haf ngone away if e wantend :-)
@Unyc,Ati you keep a book of shrubs LOL you should publish it one day so we can share the laughs.
@Komi, Nothing wrong with having a local accent everyone in the world has one including Americans and the English e.g. southern drawls,cockney english. Its hard to teach the kids our languages nowadays instead they are developing their own
@Klara, Ve shal vait and ze
@Leticia, Karibu sana, Hizo accents haziwezi kupotea.

Farmgal said...

Kirima post an audio blog...we'll give you feedback on ur accent!

Klara said...

Plz fafanua hiyo!

Anonymous said...

Yeah Farmgal. We neend the aundio.

jm said...

Totally unrelated my guy ... but I think tumenyakua title after that Everton thrashing!! Fergie is Lord.

Unknown said...

@Farmgal, Klara, Bomseh. Nice try! but sorry this mumeru's accent will remain anonymous for now!
@Mwangi, I'm delirious with joy we have one hand on the trophy I hope all the haters are watching keenly. Sir Alex! Amen!

Juju said...

about shrubbing-- tell u what? its really not important. Of course for some jobs it matters if one is articulate enough. And when u come stateside, even the most "urban" accent will be heard, some will consider it "beautiful" while others will not "understand."

Anonymous said...

pirates vs spidey ?
i have answered ur challenge and i challenge u as well

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